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A Chinese article that can make a stone cry – 永失我爱 (20)

Posted by Grace Feng on March 6, 2012

A Chinese article that can make a stone cry – 永失我爱 (20)This article was first posted on a Chinese forum 网易(wǎng yì) by writer “春儿(chūn r)” some years ago. It was so touching and well written that people started to share it across the web.

The original article is about 10824 character long. I’ll post them in a series of posts with pinyin annotation and my own English translation. An online radio recording by 晓风(xiǎo fēng) from www.1ting.com is also placed at the beginning of each post. Please be aware that the recording has slight changes in wording here and there compared to the original article. The recording has been split into smaller parts to align with the length of each post.

Feel free to drop your comments along your reading. If you have questions, I’ll try my best to respond within 24 hours.

 

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yǒng shī wǒ ài

永失我爱 (20)

My Love Lost Forever

 

chūn r

春儿

 

 

àiren gàosu wǒ:“ wǒ bǎ chòu chòu de nǎipíng fàng dàoliǎo tā de shēnbiān, háiyǒu tā de xiǎo kǎo lā péi zhe tā。…

爱人告诉我:“我把臭臭的奶瓶放到了他的身边,还有他的小考拉陪着他。…

My lover told me:” I placed Chou Chou’s bottle and his favorite koala beside him….

 

… wǒ bǎ tā cóng lěng guì lǐ chūlái bào chūlái de shíhou, tā nàge yàngzi jiù xiàng zài shuìjiào, wǒ qīn le qīn tā

…我把他从冷柜里出来抱出来的时候,他那个样子就像在睡觉,我亲了亲他

de liǎn。…

的脸。…

…When I held him out from the fridge, he looked like sleeping. I kissed his face. …

 

wǒ zǒng gǎnjué tā mǎshàng néng zhēngkāi yǎnjing hǎn bàba shìde。”

…我总感觉他马上能睁开眼睛喊爸爸似的。”

It felt like he’d open his eyes any time soon and call me Dad.”

 

wǒ de lèishuǐ dī zài le àiren de liǎn shàng, wǒ xīnténg ā, xīnténg zhège jiānqiáng de nánrén。

我的泪水滴在了爱人的脸上,我心疼啊,心疼这个坚强的男人, …

My tears dropped on my lover’s face. My heart hurt, it hurt for this strong man, …

 

dìyīcì liúlùchū tā de cuìruò, tā duì háizi de ài tóngyàng shì nàyàngde shēnchén。

第一次流露出他的脆弱,他对孩子的爱同样是那样的深沉。

… for the very first time he showed his weakness. His love for our child was as deep as mine.

 

tā yīzhí zài zhīchēng zhe wǒ。 zài yǒuxiē shíhou wǒ kěyǐ táo, dàn tā bùnéng。 wǒ kěyǐ kū, dàn tā bùnéng。

他一直在支撑着我。在有些时候我可以逃,但他不能。我可以哭,但他不能。

He had been my strong support. Sometimes I could escape, but he could not. I could cry, but he could not.

 

wǒ kěyǐ qù shùshuō, tā bùnéng。 tā zhǐnéng qù miànduì, zhǐnéng xuǎnzé jiānqiáng。 yīnwèi tā shì nánrén。

我可以去述说,他不能。他只能去面对,只能选择坚强。因为他是男人。

I could talk it out, he could not. He could only face it, he could only choose to be strong, because he’s a man.

 

shìde, zài háizi bìng de shíhou。 wǒ bǎ quánbù de jīnglì dōu fàng zài le háizi shēnshang。

是的,在孩子病的时候。我把全部的精力都放在了孩子身上。

Yes, when our child was sick, I devote all of my energy to my child,

 

hūlüè le duì àiren de guānxīn。

忽略了对爱人的关心。

I neglected the care for my lover.

 

zài yǐhòu de rìzi lǐ tā de tóngshì gàosu wǒ:“ tā shàngbān shí zǒngshì zài nàli fādāi, huòzhě yīgèrén zhuàn

在以后的日子里他的同事告诉我:“他上班时总是在那里发呆,或者一个人转

lái zhuànqù, xiàng fēng le yīyàng。”

来转去,像疯了一样。”

In the days after, his colleague told me:” He used to be absent-minded at work, or walked back and force alone, like a nuts.”

 

wǒ de àiren ā, nǐ bù shuō, nǐ shénme yě bù shuō, nǐ zhǐshì mòmò de dúzì chéngshòu zhè yīqiè……

我的爱人啊,你不说,你什么也不说,你只是默默的独自承受这一切……

My lover, you said nothing, said not even a word, you just endure all of this by yourself…

 

wǎnshang, wǒ hé àiren bǎ chòu chòu suǒyǒu de wánjù, yīfu hé chòu chòu yòng guò de dōngxi, zhàopiàn hé wǒ de rì

晚上,我和爱人把臭臭所有的玩具,衣服和臭臭用过的东西,照片和我的日

jì, dào shízìlùkǒu quánbù shāodiào le

记, 到十字路口全部烧掉了。

that night, my lover and I took all the toys, clothes and other things that were used by Chou Chou to the intersection and burned them all.

 

wǒ bǎ yǒuzhe《 bàwángbiéjī》 hé《 Zhōngguó gōngfu》 de cídài hé lù xiāng dàigěi tā dàizǒu le, háiyǒu tā suǒ

我把有着《霸王别姬》和《中国功夫》的磁带和录相带给他带走了,还有他所

yǒuxīn ài de xiǎoqìchē, hé tā xǐhuan de《 wáwa huàbào》……

有心爱的小汽车,和他喜欢的《娃娃画报》……

We let Chou Chou to take away all the cassettes and video tapes that had ” Farewell My Concubine” and “Chinese Kongfu” on them, also all the toy cars that he loved, and his favorite Wa Wa magazine…

 

 

Related posts:

A classic Chinese love song
A Chinese article that can make a stone cry – 永失我爱 (11)
Story Time! Listen to a story (for adults) read in mandarin and learn Chinese online

 

Category: Chinese reading and listening

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